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Monday, February 21, 2011

Abyss



Has anyone felt that they have been in an abyss, that feeling of sinking deeper and deeper into a black hole with no light in sight? I have been in many such dark impenetrable holes, most were scary experiences, but there was an exception. It was the day my son was born.
He was born on 29th March ’94, eleven days premature. Due to complications I had to opt for having doctors cut me up. The amniotic fluid was slowly dissipating and my baby was getting cramped inside the walls of his home, my womb. The efficient doctors led me on a stretcher to the OT and the anesthetist kept murmuring sweet nothings to me as he injected me with general anesthesia. I don’t know when it took over but before I knew I was plummeting into an abyss, dark and cold. My silent screams did nothing to stop my fall. It was frightening at first but then flashes of thoughts crossed my mind. I was not alone in that dark hole, my thoughts were my company…  but uppermost  was of my baby, waiting to hear the miracle workers from up there to give me news of my baby.
Finally I heard them…. I cannot express the feeling of elation as snatches of conversation filtered down. It was a boy! From what I could gather in that dank hole with its cold walls was that everything was fine, he was a normal baby. I remember thanking god for this miracle. But my happiness was short-lived. The walls came caving in when I heard them give an anxious exclamation. I knew something was wrong and I helplessly prayed at that moment. Please god let my baby be alright.
God did hear my prayers that day in that abyss and my baby turned out to be fine. The problem was with me. They discovered a cyst that had to be operated. So by the time they were ready to sew me up, I was almost out of that abyss. I felt every pain of them stitching me back. My screams were just a silent echo as I held on to my sanity. I knew I had to get out of that hole to see my bundle of joy. When I held him that night in my arms I promised to protect him and love him with my being.
Today this bundle of joy is almost seventeen. He protects me more than I. We have had our tumultuous journey together and we know there will be more to overcome as well smell the flowers along the way. I have come a long way from that abyss, often plunging into deeper ones but that dive into that one on that fateful day is something I will cherish till the end.  
http://kriti-howaboutthis.blogspot.com/2011/01/eternity.html

14 comments:

  1. very very wonderful kriti is right you a wonder ful writer. thanh you for sharing this woder of life with us thank you a god did hear you and bless you thank you and god bless

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  2. OMG Rims..you are awesome ....writer and mother!

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  3. Dear Rim,
    Yes, life itself is a miracle nd bringing a new life into the world even more so. So much can go wrong but most of the time things set themselves right.God bless, Rims

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  4. Thank you Chuku and Purobi, I think we mothers know what the feeling is like to bring a baby into this world

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  5. Hi Rimly,

    Your have really shown the pain and the after fruits you got of it , it was a very difficult time I can think of and you came over it , thats wonderful , and Glad to hear you both came out victorious which is simply God grace..there was a similar not exactly same but a instance happened in my family too..it was a rare case.

    Take care.
    It was nice reading through to your space.

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  6. I had a similar experience and those moments of not knowing are awful, they take you to places you never imagined you would ever go. I'm so glad 17 years later you can look back, write how you came through it and share your amazing story.

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  7. Rimly, you are a terrific writer and mother, love it that you are finally sharing your wonderful thoughts with us. Am so glad, we met and connected in this life time, my Outlier. Great post friend.

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  8. Rimly wonderful story! Abyss indeed...

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  9. Whoa. Pretty intense and full of great feeling. So relieved you both made it through okay!!!! Life's crazy and intense and just plain weird.

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  10. Thank you everybody. I think all of us mothers can identify with Abyss. Thank you R.M

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  11. Lovely post - you must be so proud of your son. K

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  12. Yes Karina, my son is one blessing I have in life. Thank you so much.

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